CaptainMcPants

Your pants, I want them.

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Defective on arrival by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

Defective on arrival

I enter the room encased in a tomb of my mother's flesh. I enter the world with blood on my hands, mourning my own death. How blessed are we when our first words can't deceive. How cursed are we when we are what we receive. I lay on my back after breaching the crack cut for my reception. I long for the walls raised around me for my conception. How vexed are we that they smile while we scream. How sure are we that we're not just someone's dream?

All I want by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

All I want

"I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ." - Mahatma Gandhi I remember being a child - It wasn't easy: I had to share a room with my brother, I didn't like the taste of my father's cooking, None of the shopping centres had quite the schoolbag that I wanted. Not much has changed. These days, you can't blame me for getting angry in traffic jams when I'm in a hurry; you can't blame me for complaining about slow internet when I'm paying for it; you can't blame me for scratching scraps off my plate when I'm full. On your way to work, you can see them everywhere; The destitute: Hungry,

Rose of Regret by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

Rose of Regret

Please excuse me that I think instead of blood, my heart pumps ink. It's just that its colour gives it away. Every written kiss I make turns into a ravishing mistake, and it's turned me tone-deaf to the beauty of each breaking day. Are you going to take my words tonight? Consent or curse my repenting plight? Are you going to pick me up or break me down? Rose-thorn girl – You make my rotten world turn round. Please forgive that I got scared as soon as you showed that you cared. It's just that I was afraid to fall for you. Every time that you reached out I pulled away – I flinched in doubt. I denied that your love fo

Living Letter by CaptainMcPants, literature

Affectionate Philanthropy by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

Affectionate Philanthropy

Congratulations! It looks like you've caught me out. If it's all the same I'd like to explain what this game was all about. It don't matter how much I want to say I care for sticking to one gal, when you know very well that for such I'm much too debonair. Now hold on! I'm not sayin' I'm not true to you – I insist my lovin' exists. It's just that you're not the only one I give it to. I'm just layin' the truth down bare. So come on dear, it's blatantly clear that you'll just have to share. I'm just too much man for you to keep me bound. I've got so much love-makin' ready for the takin' that it would be selfish not

Veritas by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

Veritas

Are words what I lack? Nothing said could count as proof. What's in your heart? Inside there, reaching and roaring to take me back to the blissful blinding truth. Your silence leaves me violent, like a beast's peace taken. No other can do to me as your voice awakens. They can't see that it's me, that I'm stuck in this dream in our heads. In our hearts we are dying. All our thanks turn to pomp as our stares turn to songs in my ears. In my eyes you are blinding. Are my words what I lack? You know which weakness left me in a bind. What's in your heart? Inside there, helping and hoping to take me back to the blissful blind. I walk i

The Dark by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

The Dark

Let me tell you about the Dark, my sweet. It prowls around the unlit street; it crawls quietly – which speaks well of the fact that it can swell from a doubt as small as the human heart: I speak of none other than the Dark. The Dark can creep without a sound, and when it does, it spies around with its beady eye in constant thought. It has only one, but thinks it a lot. That all consuming hunger it cannot sate, worse than hatred that outlives who hate, further than fears from sinister dreams, or the haunting echo of bloodcurdling screams. It has but one thought it cannot complete: That singular mindset of something to eat.

Abstract Noun by CaptainMcPants, literature

Cognitive Bias by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

Cognitive Bias

I remember when I used to feel something; towards it, and not away, I'd be running. I used to be so full of life: Guns-blazing all the time! I remember when I used to feel something; scared stiff and still daring. I used to be so full of life: If you pierced me I'd be bleeding wine. Smiling or crying all the while I was proven happy or not I was absolutely human. After the mess I guess I stand corrected – that mask made sure the face got neglected. I might remember that I could feel something, which apparently is different from this hushing. I'm pretty sure I was full of life, restlessness in my eyes. Maybe I've become an

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Defective on arrival by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

Defective on arrival

All I want by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

All I want

Rose of Regret by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

Rose of Regret

Living Letter by CaptainMcPants, literature

Affectionate Philanthropy by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

Affectionate Philanthropy

Veritas by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

Veritas

The Dark by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

The Dark

Abstract Noun by CaptainMcPants, literature

Cognitive Bias by CaptainMcPants, literature

Literature

Cognitive Bias

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Acid by poshlost, literature

Literature

Acid

I stopped writing when I turned 20 degrees Celsius, and the acid evaporated from my veins. No more stormy seas or dreams that I can feel the erythrocytes crashing against my eyelids and fists—now My heartbeat is like the hollow canals of Venice drowning in air, drains overflowing into drains, Like abandoned gardens hanging between bricked up dreams, built six stories higher than I would ever need.

Flicker by crookedbitterfingers, literature

Literature

Flicker

She sits at the right end of the chair in the hallway. Her hands on her knees, feet together, and toes curled in her huaraches; back slightly curved from the poor posture she had since childhood; face so pale, partly covered by her brown unhealthy hair as if trying to hide those blank green eyes from the penetrating lights. She tries to lock herself away from the noises of the beasts passing by, laughing and making fool of themselves just to please everybody else; lock herself away from the flashy beasts that live on praises and false appreciations. She looks at the ceiling, picturing the hallway lights flickering slowly like tha

Ultrasoundly by eatlimegreen, literature

Literature

Ultrasoundly

That big machine has its eye pushed to my belly playfully; as it shoots little whispers to my spine; the core He shows himself cuddling cold and a sketch inside, yet he gives a sign of contentment; liveliness. It's inside attached all over me, feeding off the good advice I give, unknowing what it's like out here all in for that one moment of non-symbioticness when I'll ease him out, but not now, give him time to sleep, wait for it. ,but as mine beats he does too.

Memories of Rain by BellaNellaMorte, literature

About CaptainMcPants

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Artist // Literature

Jan 26
South Africa
Deviant for 13 years
He / Him

Badges

My Bio

I’m a poet intent on finding new and creative ways of expressing myself – your critique will help me develop even further.

Like many poets who start at a young age, I particularly enjoyed using rhythm and rhyme in my writing to add structure to my perception of a world in chaos. Naturally, I’ve since developed into an adult who is no longer as afraid and naïve, but still longing to make sense of the complexity of human behaviour.

I experiment with many techniques, especially using subtle detail that will delight the reader with a fine eye. Topography, punctuation, onomatopoeia, and even deliberate mistakes in spelling or grammar can add to the effect of my poetry - often critical to finding its hidden messages of inner conflict or hope.

If you’d like to join us on Doctrinaire, you’d be pleasantly surprised at the efficacy of our membership (none of whom we guarantee clinically sane) – it truly is a magnificent theatre of poetry and prose.

In the end my work will just have to speak for itself.

Current Residence: Nelspruit, South Africa
Personal Quote: Don't carry loose change - It attracts mice.

Favourite Games

Magic: The Gathering

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CaptainMcPants

Jan 26, 2011

Spread the love

0 min read

Dearest soft, squishy, and oozing with love deviants :blowkiss: Today, a deviantART news feature jumped up from behind a bush and :licking: licked me: The Never Gonna Give You Up Community Project which brings to its reader's attention that people, depending on how much you'll let them, will mould you into whatever kind of person it is you want to become.  What then better choice is there to make in your life than the people you hold close, overcome difficulties with, and more importantly how you care for others. :community:   In exactly the same way as we are influenced, we must also choose to influence others as best we can;  whether the

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CaptainMcPants

Dec 28, 2010

Sawubona! I'm back

0 min read

Sawubona  Mngani wami! Ngiyakubingelela egameni Jesu Christu It all started with a phone call :mobile: at a coffee shop one night.  A phone call that, despite my working environment at the time, would allow me a gap wherein I could finally take some time off.  I immediately alerted my business associates, shrugged off the semi-formal attire, packed my backpack, and headed off into what, as a tiny white computer nerd, I could only comically describe as dark Africa. Let me tell you something about

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CaptainMcPants

Dec 22, 2010

African Adventure

0 min read

Hi there folks! I'm writing this journal entry on behalf of Hector (Captain McPants), so don't get your hopes up. He decided at the last minute (as in the same day he left) to pack whatever fit into his backpack, take off work indefinitely, and go to some remote dilapidated African country to do God's work. He phoned me to give me login details for stuff like deviantART to let all his friends know (because, frankly, he didn't let anyone except his boss and business partners know).  Typically, he doesn't even know when he's coming back.  Knowing him, he'll have a good story to tell when he's back. Later folks! Hector's Little Helper

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Profile Comments 61

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TheLoveTrain

Jan 27, 2012

Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday dear Hector,
Happy Birthday to you.

I hope it's your best one ever. Eat lots of

(and some for me).

~Brian

PS: Quit wasting time on Buttbook!

forty-two-point-five

Jul 12, 2011

Long time, no poems.... I am sad...

Thanks for the fave

When you feel like you have nothing, that is when a smile means everything. My mom taught me to smile at everyone. She always told me that the smile that you give someone might be the only smile that they have gotten all day, and you never know how important that might be. My world has fallen apart on me enough times to know of what I speak, and I know that what my mom taught me is true. Smiles are free and they are always in stock. Loved your journal entry "Spread the love", which prompted me to write this (sorry it's so long). To wrap it up, if anyone is reading this, I encourage them to smile at someone who looks like they could use it, like someone you know, or even a stranger, and if they give you a funny look who cares. The majority of people do find it odd, which is sad. However, the days that you will brighten makes it more than worth it. I promise.

CaptainMcPants

Jan 30, 2011

You and mommy dearest are absolutely right! Just like one can paricipate in the deviantART community projects, one can participate in real life. A smile is the Like button of the real world.

Don't apologise for lengthy comments - it means you have a lot to say and I'm sure as shapoopie not gonna stop you from saying it.

The only thing I don't get is the anger emoticon you placed in this comment.

How strange...

TheLunaLily

Jan 31, 2011

I did? I have no idea how that happened. I never use that one. Sorry about that emoticon!

Jade-Pandora

Jan 28, 2011

I am compelled to watch you now...

...and I see you just had a b-day - a belated Happy Birrthday to you, Hector. ^.^

hmmm., you''re my first Hector.